In honor of International Day of Women and Girls in Science (February 11) and International Women’s Day (March 8),
AWIS invited members to write letters to their 13-year-old selves—sharing the insight, reassurance, and perspective they’ve gained along their journeys in STEM.
"Don't be afraid. Get the best education you can and shoot for the stars. Although my mother was not supportive and always disparaged my accomplishments saying, "You are not smart; you just work hard," I took that as a challenge to prove that she was wrong. I knew that MIT was one of the top universities for science and engineering. When I entered MIT as a freshman in the fall of 1969, the ratio of men to women was about twenty to one. While not all of the faculty were supportive of women, some were and they reached out to me providing valuable support and guidance. My career was shaped by men (including many men from the Middle East) who helped me and people (including a female boss) who blocked me. In 1977, I became the first woman to receive a Ph.D. in Geophysics from Stanford. My career provided fascinating travel around the world and numerous challenges. I have now been married over 53 years, have two children and 5 grandchildren. You can have it all!"
“Dear 13-year-old me: You don’t have to be the loudest in the room to belong in science. Curiosity whispers before it shouts, and the questions you’re afraid to ask might be the very ones that change everything. Science isn’t about being the fastest; it’s about enduring the discomfort of not knowing and staying curious anyway. Your persistence will carry you further than talent ever could.”
"Your lived experience isn't a barrier to science. Regardless of what you go through it’s your foundation and likely your superpower. STEM isn't about fitting into existing spaces. It's about reshaping them using those lived experiences."
"l wish l knew being well-rounded across disciplines is key for navigating your career path as well as making an impact!"
“You don’t have to be alone in Science! Just keep your mind open to collaborations even if it is beyond your field. Real magic happens when you collaborate with right people!”
"You don't have to be fearless or perfect to belong to science. Curiosity and persistence matter far more. As a woman in medicine, I wish I'd know at age 13 that self-doubt is common, even among highly capable people, and it does not mean you are in wrong path."
"I didn’t realize early on that my engagement with nature and food systems would shape my scientific career, and that curiosity can have a lasting impact."
"Your convictions are strong enough, and your belief in yourself will take you far. Be open-minded and attentive to the unconventional areas of science that spark your interest."
A couple longer reflections…
“Dear 13-year-old me,
Hope high school treats you well! I know you already feel the weight of expectations.
You’re growing up in a world that has very clear ideas about what girls should do — how they should behave, what they should study, and who they should become. You hear it often: be quiet, be good, be agreeable.
But I need you to know something early — your mind is not secondary. Your curiosity is not inconvenient. Your ambition is not rebellion.
You are going to fall in love with science. Not the safe version that everyone approves of, but the kind that makes you ask questions, stay up late reading, and dream beyond what’s familiar. When most people push you toward the traditional path that are “Safe for girls” — you will stubbornly choose biotech and research instead. They will question it, downgrade it, outright reject the idea. They will question you. Choose it anyway.
There will be people who believe women don’t need to work as hard. That women don’t need careers. That motherhood is the only achievement that matters. One day, you will have two beautiful children — and you will love them fiercely. But you will also love your research. And loving both does not make you selfish.
It will not be easy.
You will carry guilt that isn’t yours. You will feel judged for going to work. You will feel stretched physically and mentally. There will be days your health suffers. There will be moments when you wonder if fighting is worth it.
Keep going.
Because one day, your research will be recognized. You will win awards and grants. You will build a life in science that no one around you could have imagined when you were 13. And you will realize that every time you choose yourself, you were quietly changing the story.
Life will never suddenly become smooth just because you work hard. That’s the truth no one tells girls. But difficulty is not a sign to stop. It’s proof that you’re moving through spaces that weren’t built with you in mind.
Endure, yes. But don’t just endure.
Dream boldly. Work relentlessly. Protect your health. Let yourself be both a scientist and a mother. Let yourself want more.
The universe has a way of meeting courage halfway.
And you, my stubborn, curious, determined girl — you will keep finding a way.
With love and pride,
You, at 30″
Shahiti Kuppa, AWIS Member Since 2024
“Dear Me,
You’re 13, sitting in your classroom in a small town, wearing that quiet mix of curiosity and doubt. You don’t realize it yet, but the world you know right now is only a tiny part of the life you’re going to live.
I know you have so many questions.
You wonder if you’re good enough. You compare yourself to students from other schools and feel like maybe they’re smarter, more confident, more “ready” than you. You feel nervous before stepping on stage, your hands slightly shaking during public speaking events, your voice not as steady as you wish it would be.
But here’s something I want you to know: those moments matter more than you think.
Every competition you participate in, whether you win or lose, is shaping you. You don’t see it now, but you are building courage. You are learning how to stand up, speak, try, and try again. That fear you feel before speaking? One day, it will turn into confidence. Not because the fear disappears, but because you learn to move forward despite it.
You think others are better than you. You think they belong more than you do.
They don’t.
You belong in every room you step into, even if it takes you time to believe it.
Right now, you have no clear idea of what you want to do in the future. That worries you sometimes. It feels like everyone else might have a plan, and you’re just figuring things out as you go.
Let me tell you a secret: not knowing is not a weakness.
You are going to explore. You are going to move from your small town to a university in a big city. You will step into spaces that feel overwhelming at first. You will meet people from different backgrounds, different cities, different worlds. And each time, you will feel a little unsure, but you will still move forward.
That is your strength.
You will travel across states, across cultures, and one day, across countries. Yes, countries. The girl sitting in that classroom right now will go to visit countries like Sweden, Spain, Switzerland, France, and the United States, not just to study, but to work, to build, to become someone she cannot yet imagine.
And you will do it on your own strength.
You will enter fields that are not always easy for women. You will sometimes feel out of place, sometimes question yourself, sometimes wonder if you truly belong there. But you will keep going. And slowly, you will realize, you are not just part of the room, you are contributing to it.
You are shaping it.
There will be failures. There will be rejections. There will be moments when you feel like you are not enough.
But listen carefully, you are more capable than you give yourself credit for.
That “small town girl” you sometimes feel limited by? She is your greatest strength. She gave you resilience, humility, and the courage to dream beyond what you have seen.
So don’t be afraid of not having a clear path. Don’t be afraid of losing. Don’t be afraid of speaking, even if your voice shakes.
Keep showing up.
Keep trying.
Keep believing, even when you’re not fully sure.
Because one day, you will look back and realize, you were always stronger than you thought.
With love,
Your Future Self”
Medha Pandey, AWIS Member Since 2026
When women in STEM share their stories, they light the way for future scientists still finding theirs.
Have a reflection to share?
We’d love to continue growing this collection.
Email rivers@awis.org with your quote or letter to your 13-year-old self and be part of this evolving community story.